Angry

Anger has never been an emotion I am good with. I have a hard time expressing it... frustration, hurt, annoyance... I'm very good with all of those, but Anger, not so much. I have spent the last three weeks going through pretty much every emotion possible, but I just really can't get past the Anger. I'm just plain stinking mad... Angry in fact, that the word cancer is apart of my life, angry at how scary this whole experience is, angry that I don't know how to express any of this, but most of all Angry with myself, because while cancer may be a part of my life right now, the whole situation could be SO much worse. And really nothing makes me madder than feeling sorry for myself.

I have been so blessed the past six months for all the positive changes that have come in my life... I have been continually trying to reflect on how truly special it is to have a "good guy" who I love, and who (amazingly enough) loves me back. So for now, I'm going to go sit in his lap, kiss him on the cheek, and say a little prayer for the patience to unravel all this anger.